2013. 6. 7.

에세이 샘플 2 (유학생, GPA 3.3, SAT 1940 - Case Western, BU 합격, Emory 대기자명단)

어렸을 적 할머니에게 의지하며 자라다가 청소년기 때 할머니를 멀리하게 되었다는 내용. 결국 나중에 치매에 걸리신 할머니를 통해 할머니의 사랑을 깨달은 내용. 아주 특이하지도 않은 주위에서 흔히 볼 수도 있는 가족 얘기지만, 이런 잔잔하고 감성적인 에세이로 학생이 성숙해 가는 과정을 보여주는 에세이도 좋은 에세이다.

Her Hand

“Always hold your grandma’s hand, Sohee.”

Day in and day out, this was what I constantly heard from my parents. Both of my parents worked when I was little, so they always made sure that I stuck right next to my grandma all the time while they were gone. My grandma was my storyteller, chef, friend, and navigator of my life. She was always with me, always did anything for me, and always loved me. Wherever there was grandma, there was a way. At that age, I thought things would be always the same between her and me.

As she got older, her body weakened and after one surgery, her health deteriorated significantly. After being released from the hospital, she would mostly lie down at home, not being able to walk around. I was busy with school, and naturally, we had less time to chat and do things together. Moreover, as I grew older, I had more “important” things to do with my friends, than with my grandma. I would even shy away from her, since her withered voice was no more like the pleasant one I heard when I was little. I didn’t like the “old” grandma nor did I need her for a friend, her guidance. I no longer needed her hand. Things now had changed.

When she was finally able to walk around, a time when the food I prepared for myself was becoming more palatable to me than her food, the first place she paid visit to was my room.

“Sohee?”

I didn’t reply, and just kept doing my thing with my back facing her. Soon I felt her approaching and her soft hand on my shoulder.

“Sohee, did you eat?”

I was amazed how light and skeletal her hand was. I was afraid to turn my head. Perhaps due to the shame from shunning her while she was in bed and selfishly minding my own fun and exciting world, I couldn’t face her directly. As if she had known what was going through my head, she slowly turned away and left my room, quietly closing the door. She didn’t come back for a while, and all I could hear was a short, intermittent clangor coming from the kitchen. And then after a moment of silence, the door opened again.

“Sohee, dinner’s ready.”

On my way to the dining table, feeling as if the whole year of my selfishness and neglect were flashing by me, I was filled with regret, self-reproach, and mostly disappointment at myself. For the first time in one year, we sat together across the table. I ate without a word. That night, I took my pillow to her room, and slept in her bosom.

Because of her health, she was no longer able to do things on her own. It wasn’t she who helped me get dressed, but it was I who helped her get dressed. It wasn’t she who helped me out of my high chair, now it was I who helped her get off her chair. I finally realized, it was now my turn to take her hand.

She is now suffering from Alzheimer. She doesn’t recognize anybody but the only name she does is Sohee. Whenever I come back home for vacation, she would make every effort to get up and greet me at the front door and ask me where I had been, while tightly holding my hand.

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